My Commitments in Marriage

I'm a list guy. I like to write things down, make notes and journal. So, I've made a list of my commitments in marriage to Ashley and to God. Here it is for what it's worth...I think it's pretty awesome. Let me know if you have ideas of things I should add.

1. Love Jesus

2. Have a job and keep it

3. Leave Mom & Dad—Genesis 2 & Ephesians 5

4. Become one with Ashley & never leave her—Genesis 2:18-25; Matthew 19:6; 1 Corinthians 7:10

5. Ashley is God’s daughter, so treat her as you should

6. Ashley is Bill’s daughter, so take care of her

7. Be a one-woman man—1 Timothy 3:2; 1 Corinthians 7:2
--a. Keep my eyes off other girls & pornography
--b. Keep my mind devoted to Ashley

8. Love Ashley as Jesus has loved me and the church and gave himself up for it—Ephesians 5:25-; Colossians 3:19

9. Disciple Ashley—Ephesians 5:26-27

10. Honor Ashley—1 Peter 3:7
--a. Physically
--b. Emotionally
--c. Verbally
--d. Financially
--e. Practically
--f. Parentally
--g. Spiritually

11. Serve Ashley as if I were serving Jesus—Colossians 3:23-24
--a. Practically with tasks
--b. Sexually—1 Corinthians 7:3-5

12. Lead Ashley
--a. God holds me accountable for my family—Genesis 3; 1 Timothy 3:4-5
--b. I am the head of Ashley—Ephesians 5:23

13. Provide for Ashley-1 Timothy 5:8

14. Protect Ashley

15. Follow Jesus example, not Adam’s

16. Don’t be a coward or a chauvinist, be a godly man

Pitfalls in Church Planting

No, I'm not an expert on church planting, but I'm learning as much as I can so that I will be well prepared one day to be a church planter and hopefully spark a church planting movement. However, some say Ed Stetzer is an expert on church planting. Ed is a great friend to our pastor and our church, he is the president of Lifeway Research, he has been involved with church planting for years and years. At the Summit, we have a church planting training program called SendRDU. Our pastor, J.D., has a God-sized vision to plant 1,000 churches through the Summit before he retires (which he has already scheduled in 2038...or something like that). Stetzer spoke for SendRDU last Tuesday at our monthly Missional Church Forum about Pitfalls in Church Planting. Here are his main points and the take-aways.

1. Lack of Preparation
Guys who typically have the drive of a normal church planter aren't the most prepared. Preparation needs to happen most in the area of spiritual preparation. Church planting is not the greatest environment for the leader to be fed spiritually.

2. Stressful Family Relationships
Planting a church magnifies and creates family issues. You are not the only church planter. Because of the work, your family is also planting the church. Both spouses must be enthusiastic about the work. Disaster happens when one is enthusiastic and one is willing. Willing won't keep you in church planting.

3. Inadequate Training
Read at least 10 books on church planting before you start. Don't fall in love with a strategy or method. Fall in love with your city, and then develop the best strategy and method to reach that city.

4. Lack of Accountability
Planters normally have more skill than maturity. It is crucial to have several mature mentors to be your guides.

5. Unrealistic Expectations
The average North American successful church plant is averaging 100 people after 4 years. This is a realistic expectation. This doesn't mean you shouldn't dream big, but keep your dreams from turning into number goals. Sometime numbers goals may be helpful, but often they are detrimental.

6. Broken Partnerships
Unfortunately, "mother churches" pull back from the plant because of unmet expectations. Don't plant a church because you think there are no good churches. Plant through a healthy church who can partner with you. Don't do it alone.

Sex

If you're wondering, no, I'm not an expert when it comes to sex. I'm engaged and getting married on July 25th. So, ask me in a few months if you need advice. Yeh, I'm a Christian who practices chastity before marriage. Anyways, I heard a great talk a few weeks ago by Mark Driscoll to 800 UNC college students concerning 3 ways our culture views sex.

1. Sex is god.

This is the predominant view of sex in our culture. We spiritually bow down to sex and worship it. It is our highest value and treasure. We long for it and serve it, and we allow it to consume our mind. We present our bodies to it and make sacrifices for it. Ultimately, it is our god. Americans spend more money on the sex industry than Major League Baseball, Basketball and Football combined. This is quite unfortunate.


2. Sex is gross.

This is the predominant view of sex among most conservative Christians and others. We don't talk about it. We sweep it under the rug and hope nobody brings it up. When it is brought up, we are told it is wicked and ungodly. It is nasty and naughty. It is what the pagans practice. This is also unfortunate.


3. Sex is a gift.

This last view is the proper and right view of sex. It understands that sex is one of the greatest gifts God has given to his creation. It is to be enjoyed and practiced. It is God's design to fill the earth with his people. It is a beautiful thing, a good thing. However, like most things in life, we unfortunately take a "good" thing and turn it into a "god" thing. Sex is supposed to glorify God. We should marvel at the knowledge and goodness of God when we think of sex. Therefore, let's keep sex in it's proper place where God designed it. He designed sex to be practiced between one man and one woman for life in the confines in marriage. This isn't because God is a mean and restrictive God. He designed it this way because this is the way it brings most satisfaction and fulfillment. When we exchange God's design for our own, we always miss the mark and ruin a good thing. He cares for us. He loves us. He wants the best for us. He is wiser than we are, and we should follow his plan and creation. This is where satisfaction, joy and fulfillment come in life.

Believe, Part 2

I wanted to share with you a few statements or anthems our church is standing on during "Believe" (the Mission Expansion Project; you can find part 1 here). It has been awesome to see our church invigorated and inspired to be a part of the mission of God for our city. Here we go:

1. "I don't want to build a monument with my life...I want to birth a movement."

2. "All that is necessary to complete the mission of God in the world is already in the hands of his church."

3. "The value you place on something is shown by what you'll give up for it."

4. "Throughout the Bible and throughout history, God shows off his power when people believe."

5. "Buildings are tools. People are our mission."

6. "I don't know what God is going to do, but I'll tell you what he won't do: he won't get up in the morning and check the stock market to determine which of his marvelous works he can afford to accomplish."

7. "God's people act differently in a time of recession because they know they have Jesus today and tomorrow."